It's been a long time since I've made a personal post, or have shared my thoughts on things such as life, death and daily living.
In September I will be 60...The number rings loudly in my ears and I wonder how time could have possibly flown by so fast!
My husband turned 70 this month. 35 years ago when we were first together I used to wonder what our lives would be like when he was 40 and me 30...then I wondered again every 10 years. I wondered what it would be like when our 2 kids left the nest and if we would still like each other..LOL. I am happy to report we do..but life changed so drastically from then to now.
The one good thing we did was raise 2 wonderful people who are honest, caring and compassionate in spite of all the mistakes we made along the way.
As I've grown older there are many things I enjoy about my age. I don't care anymore who likes and who doesn't because for the most part, I like me :). Things don't get to me the way they did when I was young. I see now that so many things that I thought were important, really weren't in the grand scheme of life.
Some of the things we learn through the aging process is because you lose people you love, your parents, relatives, friends and fur kids that were so close to your heart. You don't think you can make it through another heartache, but we do, time and time again. Each time we grow and learn something new about ourselves and just how strong we really are.
Some of us, a lot of us actually, become caretakers for aging parents or in my case a grandparent. It is not easy having our own health issues to care for someone else, but we do it out of love and that to makes us stronger and teaches us patience when we think we have none left to give.
Some where along the line, I think between 30 and 40 we learn that it is up to us to make ourselves happy, not someone else.
But with that said there is also tremendous joy when we make others happy with a simple phone call, card or a kind word.
I have learned it is easier to be positive in life, and positive attracts positive, negative attracts negative. Also it's much better to live in the "now", yesterday is gone, but I store those lessons in the back of my head for future reference. Tomorrow is not here yet, and I can plan until the cows come home what tomorrow may be like..but when it gets here, sometimes , many times, it has it's own plan.
So I guess what I'm really saying is at almost 60 I've finally grown up...I don't know if that's good or bad, really.
There will always be that part of me that misses playing hide and seek after dark on a summer night, Halloweens were we'd fill up a pillow case and have to go home and dump it out and go back out for more..Things that today's kids don't have the sheer joy of doing.
Such good memories tucked inside my head, along with all the sad ones and all of the hurt. I never want to be bitter about life. I don't want to be one of those old women that you see the bitterness time has left..on their faces. I want to be a happy, crazy old woman creating with my hands until my times comes to leave this world and go on my" Great Adventure", as my Momma said...
For now I'm still here, and I wonder how my feelings will change when I turn 70!